In career health life realtalk school

On Crying


       God I hate crying. Like a lot. Actually who does like crying? You're all puffy, and wet, and venerable. My defense mechanism is to cry whenever I'm really really mad, or don't know what's going on.
       The reason crying sucks is because it makes you look weak, and I don't wanna go all feminist on you (but I totally can) but I don't really freaking hate that.
     
       What I think people think about me when I cry: 
             -What a baby. 
             -Her emotions are controlling her. 
             -She must be overwhelmed.
             -Poor thing
             -Someone needs a Pumpkin Spice Latte

       Another note, why are emotions so bad? I always feel guilty whenever I'm in a bad mood, like my bad mood will rub off on people and I'm just this storm cloud of gloom. It's like we have to be happy all the time, or we have to be crying our eyes out. (Sorry I tried to put a lid on the feminism thing, it just didn't work.) Women seem to have such extreme emotions, we're either suppose to be ecstatic about pointless stuff, or crying our eyes out because something isn't working how we want. Look at advertising! Have you ever seen a woman in advertising be like Meh, these clothes are cool?  NO! They're either laughing histarically at something, or looking super childish, or looking mean moto Better not take my bag like.

       I think my crying makes me a bad feminist. Like I'm suppose to be this bra burning brute with a scrillix hair cut. I know I know that's not what feminism really is, but it's the image we get. Most of the time I try to represent myself as a feminist: strong, independent woman who don't need no man and all that jazz. So whenever I cry, I feel like I'm sliding into the stereotype of a helpless girl.

        Have you ever seen that Grey's Anatomy episode when Dr. Yang cries and starts yelling "Somebody sedate me!"?
       That's basically how I feel when I cry.

       If you couldn't have guessed, I cried earlier this week.  Originally I was embarrassed by the fact that I cried, I tried really hard to hide it, even though it didn't work. I've kinda gotten over the embarrassment of it, but I'm not going around telling people I cried...Oh wait I guess I am. The point of this is that while crying does make you look like a baby, it's not a big deal. It happens, hopefully less frequently over time, but it happens.

BTW go follow @NoToFeminism  on Twitter.

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In life

Links



For day when you over sleep

Staying safe on campus

Maybe we should start reading this before flu season

I've been checking this list a lot as we're starting to get ready to move into my first apartment

College girl's guide to using a planner

The weekend has been murdering my diet

I miss getting to design this kind of stuff. Design is something I really love, and I use to take so much inspiration from this website's typography. 

For scheduling blog posts

Wash key and how to hand wash stuff (like my scarves that are starting to get a stench)

on Goal setting

For your girls

My new Lingerie store (because sometimes a girl just wants some grown up undies (not that I can afford a $50 bra right now))

Almost time to start scouring this site

My non-slutty Halloween Costume

Budgeting for my first Apartment and another moving checklist

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In career health life school

Taking Stock: September Week 4

Where have I been the last two weeks? Honestly I feel like I've been in a daze between working two jobs, going to school full time, and spending time with my family and boyfriend. Unfortunately my blog is the first thing that gets pushed aside during busy weeks, for that I apologize. I could write a whole post about why I'm so busy, and how I feel overwhelmed sometimes, but I don't think it would benefit anyone, so I'll get right into my goals for the week.

Wanting: To move into my new apartment FINALLY
Reading:  Their Eyes were watching God for English
Wearing:My new Army Green Jacket from work
Bookmarking: Duolingo a free game for studying spanish right on your phone
Feeling: Anxious for the coming week
Planning: What I need to bring to ACL next month!
Loving: My Kindle paperwhite
Watching: The Maze Runner tonight!

I have been keeping weekly goals the past two weeks, and here are last week's.

1. Keep up with reading for English
2. Blog 2 times
3. Get an A on my Math test
4. Read 1/2 of Bad Feminist
5. Learn spanish Vocabulary words
6. Bring water bottle to class everyday
7. Do research for speech
8. Go Running at least once
9. Write two newspaper stories
10. Have a lunch date with my sister

Here's this week's goals:

1. Look at and Apply for an apartment
2. Miss no deadlines at work
3. Post 3 times
4. Bring a watter bottle to class everyday
5. Keep up with English reading
6. Lose 3 lb
7. Have a lunch date with my sister
8. Make Spanish Flashcards on Sunday (Today!)
9. Study Spanish Flashcards 20 min everyday
10. Go running at least once

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In career health life Musings realtalk

On Coming Clean

twitter

       I've started using Twitter a lot, and it's made me think about the idea of exposing yourself. Sometimes I feel like I/we use Twitter as a place to complain, other times I see it as a useful tool to connect people in real time, like earlier this month when #whyistayed and #whyileft were going around or live tweeting during the EWA conference. But I also spend a lot of my time on Twitter talking about how late I am, or how much I need coffee to get through my mornings. Is it this new cultural norm to want everyone to know everything about my life? Do I really see myself as that important?

       I suppose the proper Millennial/Generation Z answer would be well of course. But it's not just 90's kids on Twitter, from what I can tell there are tons of older people on Twitter and other social media as well. In school it's all about how you perceive yourself. When I went through training at the Shorthorn they told me "Perception is Reality" which is the basis of that scary movie that just came out "As above, So below". Basically, if you make it look like you're charming and put together, then you are.

       Then we have things like this blog. I do a lot of journal entry type posts where I admit to feeling scared, or embarrassed, or mad, or whatever. Yeah yeah employers see this stuff like my peer mentor said in a learn-how-to-college class I have to go to. But are the ideas or experienced of me as a college freshman that impactful on my work ethic or whatever else needed to determine hireability? I guess the better question is does exposing your personal/emotional/spiritual/whatever life give people a reason to look down on you when perception is reality?

       One of my professors quoted proverbs 17:28 this week "even the foolish are thought wise if they keep silent." Does that mean people see me as stupid if I admit to feeling a certain way? Then again I personally respect brute honesty from people. I like it when someone tells me they're feeling overwhelmed, it makes me want to do whatever I can to help them. I also like when people tell met they're mad, or disappointed in me. (On aside, I really hate disappointing people or not living up to expectations. Most of the time I come up with these overly ambitious expectations for myself anyway but that's another post.)

       If perception is reality, and I'm showing off that I have emotions and self doubts, and all these other flaws, does that make me a flawed person? I think the answer lies within the question. Yes perception is realiaty, I think the problem is with social media in general. Especially sites like Linkedin, and Facebook where only future employers and grandmothers look. I'm putting my best self up on these types of sites so people think I'm smart, and charming and whatever else. Wouldn't it be a better experience if employers/people knew the worst about us? Again I respect brute honesty, and that's why I give it when people can take it. Maybe linkedin needs a "Things I really suck at" list instead of an endorsement list.

       I think what social media needs in a human element, which is why twitter so so successful. On twitter you can see the good AND the bad sides of me. You can see that I'm late to class sometimes, or that I really didn't agree with a person. The thing with social media is it doesn't have to all be sunshine and rainbows and endorsement lists.  People make up the internet, so making us appear non-human (i.e. perfect happy socialites all the time) is making a fake world.

       I don't known, I think I'm thinking myself in circles to ignore studying for a spanish test. What do you think? Does brute honesty about yourself make you weak? Why should we think we matter on social media? When does Social Media go too far? 

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In career health life

Spoken Word poetry


This guy is such an amazing performer! His album of spoken word poetry is on preorder now!


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In links

links


Do not mis those years, anyway, this week is just a collection of stuff I've been reading, and it's a lot about journalism. I've decided to switch my major next semester to full fledged Journalism after getting the opportunity to attend the Education Writer's Association conference this past weekend at SMU. Anyway here's some links.

How to interview people

Bath time!

I've got a thing for spoken word poetry. Here's my favorite poet, Neil Hilborn and his new album.

How to stay well in college

You ever feel so stressed that you wanna eat yourself?

A new song from Donald Glover?

In case you were wanting to start blogging

Might as well if your man has it on

10 tips for aspiring Journalists

How to Tweet your Beat

#whyIstayed has some really powerful stories out there.

On that note check out the power of the #

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In career health life

Habit of the week: Stop Complaining...even online

Here's a new regular Imma start doing, my habit of the week. I'll talk about a habit I'm trying to make or break and post some tips for how I plan to do so. I've got a lot of good ideas for this, but if you think of some you should comment below!

This week's habit is to stop complaining.

Those people who are always complaining are such a drag, and when you think about it the world isn't going to end because you had to park in the punishment lot at school. 

Check out this post from Tiny Buddha on how to complain less and be happier

Or this one from Life Hack if you're feeling a little less zen

And you'll probably get mad at people who get to complain this week so here's an article about how to deal with cronic complainers from Psychology Today

But we still gotta vent, so here's how to know the difference

For me I like to journal when I'm feeling complainey... is that a word? (The red squiggle under the word says no)

And btw about the music industry

And even though 42% of people who complain about customer service via social media get a response in 60 min, It's not an excuse then there's nothing anyone can do about it. Complaining is one of the main reasons I don't like using twitter so much.

Sometimes I feel like complaining is the most pointless thing ever, and it's basically science that listening to too much complaining is bad for you.

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